this one's for katie

Dear Baby Sis, 

I just wanted to take a minute to tell you how proud... how very proud of you I am today. I know you must be a bit relieved right now as I know first-hand how much you struggled to make this decision. Devoting 18 months of your life to serve Heavenly Father is far from easy. It requires sacrifice. It requires love. It requires selflessness. It requires something of the soul. 

Let me tell you now.... it's not gonna be easy. If your mission is anything like mine was, you can expect long, tiring days. Days where everything simply goes wrong. Look forward to rejection. Lots of it. Some days you might walk for hours in the rain without having a single, successful conversation though you will try desperately. Yep, this is totally normal. You will most likely wear holes through all of your shoes. Even the ones that seemed with the rubber soles that seemed entirely dependable.  

Maybe one day you might be out passing out invitations for a ward social only to get your leg ripped up by some angry dog. ouch. You will miss your favorite music and alone time. Especially at the beginning. Sometimes your companion will drive you crazy. On those days you might be tempted to never come out of the shower because you know that is the only alone time you will get for the day. Some mornings you will go to your closet and think the following: "if I have to wear one of my five go-to skirts one more time....." 

You will grow to love the people of San Jose oh so very much. You will do everything you can to get them to feel what you believe to be true with your whole heart and soul. You will pray and fast. Fast and pray. Yet sometimes, despite your best efforts, they will turn away. And some nights when you think that all hope is lost, you will soak your pillow with your tears. 

I just felt it was only fair to warn you. In my opinion, anyone who claims to have had the perfect, flawless, pain-free mission is either lying or suffering from a serious case of dementia. It's not a cakewalk. 

HOWEVER, I'm not going to leave you hanging. It gets less depressing. Pinky promise

I am not lying, nor exaggerating, when I tell you that you have just made the best decision of your whole, entire life. Katie, I loved my mission. I loved the people. I loved my badge. With time, I even loved the strict schedule. I grew to trust my loving Heavenly Father because that was the only choice I had. And through the process, I got to feel the love he has for every single one of his children. At both my highest of highs and my lowest of lows (especially during the low points) I felt a driving force helping me out. Pushing me forward. 

So my darling. Go out there and change the world. One soul at a time. Work hard and never forget your purpose. You have been given a unique time in your life to focus on serving others. Take advantage because life will never be that simple again. You will have doubts and questions. In those moments just focus on the ground you have already won. The truths you have already internalized. No one can ever take your faith away from you because that is yours.

You are going to be wonderful. Katie, I have seen just a glimpse of your potential these past few months as you have been the most patient, loving confidant a girl could ask for during my fairly rocky adapting period. Thank you for lending me your shoulder to cry on. more than once The world needs a few more of those to go around. 

And just know that though it will seem like we are a world away, your support system is as strong as ever. We will be here rooting for you and praying for you. And you best believe we will be counting the days so you don't have to. 

I think the miracle of the mission is that despite it being hard (if you need a reminder of just how hard, simply scroll up a ways) in a year and a half's time you will be on a plane coming home and you will sob your eyes out. You will not want to leave the people/place that you have grown to love so much. And in that moment you will realize that it was worth every second. 

xoxo

L.

PS... for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy!