The only thing we have to fear is fear itself

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." - Franklin D. Roosevelt

I have a confession to make. A secret really... I am deathly afraid of needles. The thought of anything penetrating my skin sends chills up my spine. I remembered this fear this week on my trip to the student health center. You see, after spending a significant time away from the country, my school requires us to take a Tuberculosis test. I have been putting this off for months now, but I finally caved and booked an appointment only to be able to register for winter classes. 

So there I sat in the office doing everything I could to distract myself, the entire time strategizing my escape route. I made my way back to the immunization office and eventually it was my turn. The nurse immediately picked up on my fears. I guess by this point I was trembling. She tried to comfort me by telling me stories of little children she has helped who would run, cry and scream. nice woman.  Somehow, I did not find a lot of solace in her stories because I am 23 years old. I mean, I successfully made my way through kindergarten shots. The years K-12 required all sorts of trips to the doctor and, dare I say, more than fifty shots. I chose to spend a summer in leprosy colonies in India. Best believe I cried merely when I saw that dreadful list. I iced my left arm for hours before only to have the ornery nurse reach for my other right one. ouch. Brazil called for even more shots. Lots of 'em. 

Point being, this is not my first rodeo. I am acquainted with my fear of needles. Yet, I continue to shy away from the thing that is supposed to keep me strong and healthy.  Irrational? Perhaps. But I guess I think that most fears are fairly irrational. 

My cute nurse put a neon bandaid on my arm and even gave me juice and crackers. I think she was worried that I might faint. I made my way home pretty proudly. I had done a hard thing. (okayy not really, but in my mind it was a bit challenging)  I rehearsed the events of the day and of the week in my mind. And I came to a few conclusions. I'll let you in on my thought process...

This week in Finance 453 (I'm trying to get as much mileage as possible from being in these 400-level classes) we studied about bank runs. Quite fascinating really. We all trust financial institutions with our precious, hard-earned dollars.We plan to use this money not only to buy houses or put our kids through college one day, but also to buy this week's groceries. Have you ever thought about just what could happen if our trusty banks suddenly crumbled? It would be chaos. We put a significant amount of confidence in our banks. So much so that our government even backs up these institutions with the promise that no matter what happens we are entitled to the money we put into our accounts up to $250,000. Considering that the government has the ability to print money it seems like a pretty sturdy promise if you ask me. 
However, bank runs are far from uncommon. Just a few years ago, one of the most powerful banks in the Europe, Swedbank, almost went belly-up as 10,000 Latvians rushed to ATMs to draw out their money after hearing rumors on twitter that the firm was in financial difficulty. About $20 million dollars were withdrawn in less than a week and Swedbank needed to replenish their ATM machines every couple of hours. This took a dramatic toll on their cash reserves. a very scary moment for all involved. 
Ironically, the rumors were completely false. People almost caused the demise of an important bank based of of pure fear. 

As people we worry. It's actually one of the things we do best at. Sometimes I worry about things that I realize are completely silly. I worry that I will never graduate attain commendable success in my career. I worry that I will never have the family life that I dreamed about since I was a child. I worry about being vulnerable in relationships knowing that I may have to pay the price: a broken heart. And yes, at 23 I still worry about that sting I will feel from an otherwise harmless needle. 

I am not justifying fear, but rather trying to understand it so that I can successfully manage it in my own life. Because at the end of the day, "all we have to fear is fear itself."



On a side note, I am reading a pretty great book about fear called How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie. (a very fitting book for this blog post) Consider my compilation of quotes my book report... Enjoy!


"I believe God is managing affairs and that He doesn't need any advice from me. With God in charge, I believe that every-thing will work out for the best in the end.So what is there to worry about?” - Henry Ford

“Think of your life as an hourglass. You know there are thousands of grains of sand in the top of the hourglass; and they all pass slowly and evenly through the narrow neck in the middle. Nothing you or I could do would make more than one grain of sand pass through this narrow neck without impairing the hourglass. You and I and everyone else are like this hourglass...if we do not take [tasks] one at a time and let them pass...slowly and evenly, then we are bound to break our own...structure.” 

“the best possible way to prepare for tomorrow is to concentrate with all your intelligence, all your enthusiasm, on doing today’s work superbly today. That is the only possible way you can prepare for the future.” 

“One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon—instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today. Why are we such fools—such tragic fools?” 



-Carnegie