growing pains

I remember when I was little and my would throb sometimes due to uncomfortable growth spurts. My dad would lovingly come to my rescue with rubbing alcohol and massage my little legs all better. That turned out to be only one of many of my experiences with growing pains. Ouch. 

In honor of Halloween, I was remembering back to an awkward moment I had my 6th grade year. New school. New friends. I felt like a big girl. Naturally I felt on top of the world. Halloween day you dropped me off in my striped green tights and witch hat only to realize that I can was the only one dressed up. I decided to brave the day but oh was it embarrassing. Ouch. Growing pains

But life went on at that ever so rapid pace. High school taught me all sorts of lessons like that sometimes pure intellect simply isn't enough. In matters of AP calculus, a lot of hard work and hours and hours of after-class dedication is the only way to get by.Ouch. I learned that try as I may, sometimes the boy I like simply won't like me. Ouch. 

Then, suddenly I found myself a world away. In São Paulo Brazil. Walking for 10-12 hours a day. Away from friends, family and all traces of my past life. I couldn't decide what kind of pain was more excruciating: physical. Those first few weeks my feet throbbed. And my legs. And my brain. Also, I thought about home and sometimes I would miss it so bad that it felt like my heart ached. But, just as time does best, it passed. Soon I felt like my precious time there was like sand slipping through my fingers. 

I knew that my time was winding down because those growing pains had finally, basically subsided. I had made the mission my comfort zone. And I've learned that God never keeps us there for very long. 

So here I am, back with all sorts of growing pains. The first few weeks I just struggled to remember what it meant to be "normal." (I've come to the conclusion that normal might just be overrated.) Then school started and that was really hard. I felt all sorts of inadequacy as I compared myself to all these brilliant, Wall Street aspiring class mates of mine. And oh dating... Don't even get me started. I still can't seem to understand it. But oh, how it can be painful. Ouch. 

But I guess I've learned that all moments, good bad or trying, all come to an end. The silver lining is meant to be found and enjoyed. And, as hard as it is, our growing pains reform us and refine us in a way that only retrospect can appreciate. 

No pain... No gain.